Getting ready for the East Coast leg of the tour. What makes for a really big shoe? Duke Ellington: the original SexyMF. The dilemma of Danny Collins: give people what they know or do new material? Steely Dan and studio musicians. What it really means to be professional?

Roger CortonSo we were supposed to talk the weekend before you started but you were playing a gig. That surprised me. Just some bar gig.

JCHYep.

RCWhy did you do that. I thought you would be resting up.

JCHYa know. I have no idea. The guy texted me a month ago and I just replied ‘Sure’. It was like a reflex. What was interesting was this: I hadn’t played with those guys in 2-3 years and ya know what had changed?

RCNothing.

JCHHow’d ya guess? Seriously. I’m sincerely surprised you got that right away. I guess I shouldn’t be because that’s something you’ve whined about before with your own band.

[…]

We review the opening weekend of the tour. The end of ownership as content moves into the cloud.

Roger CortonThree gigs in one weekend. How are ya feeling, champ?

JCHPretty good. I got a chance to see Will Allen.

RCThe urban farming guy? So -that- was why you wanted to start in Wisconsin! Thinking. Always thinking.

JCHYeah. We should put a link to his stuff.

RCSo I noticed you conducting a bit during the opening to Solid State Siren and then in the quiet middle section of Home.

JCHThe arm flapping? Well, there’s no other way to do it. In the case of SSS, although it sounds ‘free’ that whole deal is notated. If someone doesn’t conduct, it’s a train wreck. And in the case of Home, that bit has two time sigs fighting against one another. So again, without someone flapping their arms. Without a little help, the players will tend to drift into one single time sig. […]

Pro tip, kids: always start your tour with a colonoscopy. Even more shocking marketing truths: Copy protection is your friend. Streaming is bad. Ownership and scarcity rule.

Roger CortonBig week. Tour starting. The first few shows are sold out. ARE YOU READY?

JCHYou bet I am, Marv! I’ve been practicing. I’ve been working out. And just to make sure I’m in tip top shape, I am havin’ that colonoscopy we discussed right before the flight.

RCThat’s crazy.

JCHNo, it’s great. I’ll be all relaxed from the gas.

RCMaybe for you.

JCHNot that gas. The anesthesia. Don’t be gross. It’ll be the best flight I’ve had in a while.

RCAnd five pounds lighter.

JCHThat too. I owe it to the fans to have a squeaky clean show.

RCNot in terms of language, however. Switching gears, we discussed marketing and the death of CDs last time and we agreed to extend that discussion.

JCHAllow me to […]

Since JC is busy practicing for the upcoming tour I am doing some housecleaning. As you know, many of our chats are heavily edited. Usually this is just to get to the point. I cut out lots of our ‘ummms’, gaping pauses and lewd humor. And then there are the times JC will drop into some made-up scene from some sci-fi movie that never got made in an alien language that should’ve been in an episode of Star Trek. And then there are the ad hoc songs. To give you an idea of the literary quality we’re talking about, here’s an example from the unedited text below.

I’d rather think of you and me
Than my next colonoscopy
But I can’t seem to put my fear behiiiiiiiiiiind mmeeeeeee!

I know I should hold back these tears
It’s only once ev’ry five years
But I can’t seem to put my fear behiiiiiiiiiiind mmeeeeeee!

We also have had about a hundred chats that have never see the light of day. Sometimes we talk and […]